Fynley’s story
To Fynley I was ‘Nana’ and he was my pride & joy. He was my special little onion with loads of layers.
£63,330 of £75,000 raised
“It’s sad, being here without him.”
We always had a special bond
I remember so clearly how we’d lie on the sofa together in the evenings, with my daughter Shannon, Fynley’s mum, sitting next to us. He’d cwtch into me and I’d sing Elvis and Disney songs to him most nights before bed. Those moments are such precious memories for me,
We always had a special bond. He didn’t have much control over his own body but could whip his head back and fore to music, a clear indication that he was enjoying life. He was blind, couldn’t cry, talk or walk but his senses were heightened. As soon as I entered a room, he would know it was me, maybe by the smell of my perfume, he got so excited.
When he was born, I knew something was wrong straight away, he was struggling to breathe. I’ve had five children of my own, and as Fynley’s Nana, I just knew. Within weeks he had to have oxygen tubes and a tracheostomy.
At first, I didn’t want to go there
That first Christmas we thought we were going to lose him. He was eight months old and in the hospital and we felt it was our final days with him because he was so, so poorly. But miraculously, on Boxing Day, he became more responsive, and we were told about Tŷ Hafan.
At first, I didn’t want to go there, we thought it was just somewhere children went to die, but we couldn’t have been more wrong. When we went to look around, I was so surprised. It wasn’t sad or morbid; it’s a lovely place. The times we had together at Tŷ Hafan were the most precious ever. I treasure those memories.
Just the fact that Tŷ Hafan included me, his Nana, and my two girls, Mia and Sasha, was amazing. That was so important to me.
Losing him, there’s no pain like it
Tŷ Hafan gave us space and time to just be together. We didn’t have to worry about the day-to-day things like doing the washing, cleaning the house or cooking. We could just spend time as a family, making memories. We’d have fun in the art room, go to the beach, and play in the playground. Swimming in the hydro pool was wonderful.
Back then I wouldn’t have been confident to take Fynley to a public swimming pool, but at Tŷ Hafan we could all swim together. That gave me the confidence to take him swimming outside of Tŷ Hafan. He loved being in the water, it was something we loved to do together.
Losing him, there’s no pain like it. I still struggle to function properly without him. He had small feet but left the biggest footprint. I have a hole in my heart that still cries for him.
And to still be involved is amazing
One of the most important things Tŷ Hafan gave us was the things we made, creating keepsakes. I wouldn’t have thought about making things we could keep, but his Memory Box is one of the most precious things I have. We made Christmas ornaments with Fynley’s handprints, I still have those ornaments, and we put them up every year. They’re priceless.
And to still be involved is amazing. I thought once Fynley died that would be it for me and Tŷ Hafan. In a way I felt a sense of loss for that relationship too. But it wasn’t like that. Fynley died 4 years ago but they still support me and my family so much. I still get invited to the Christmas Panto every year. It’s like Tŷ Hafan has still got a part of Fynley. They know him and they remember him. I feel so connected to him there. When I’m at Tŷ Hafan I’m still Fynley’s Nana. That means the world to me.
Thank you for all of your donations so far, you’re amazing!
We are incredibly grateful for the amazing generosity of everyone who has contributed to our appeal so far! If you haven’t yet had the chance to donate, now is the perfect time to get involved. Every contribution, no matter how big or small, goes straight towards helping families in Wales through their child’s short life, death and beyond.
£63,330 of £75,000 raised
£63,330 of £75,000 raised
Hear from other families
As part of our campaign, we’re proud to share the heartfelt stories of three incredible families who have been impacted by the support of Tŷ Hafan. Each story is a powerful reminder of the vital role your donations play in providing care and support to families like these.
Violet’s Story
Tŷ Hafan were there for us when Violet was dying, they were there for us when she died and they have been there for us since then. It’s what every parent needs when they lose their child and my heart breaks to know that not every family has that.
Winnie’s Story
Our Tŷ Hafan experience was out of this world. We left the hospice after Winnie’s death feeling lighter, but like our lives had turned backwards and we couldn’t suss out the path ahead. But whatever our path is now, we have been, and we still are so supported by Tŷ Hafan on this path.
Zach’s Story
Tŷ Hafan was quiet and peaceful, so that’s where Zach spent his final days. He was back in a calm environment without the constant checks, tests and needles. He was given space to relax.